Today I was driving home from my work appointments and listening to the local sports talk radio show. It’s a few days before the Super Bowl, and it seems all have moved on from “Deflate Gate” so a new topic needed to headline the next talking segment. Superstar Richard Sherman, the cornerback for the Seattle Seahawks has a pregnant girlfriend, and that bitch has the nerve to be due Super Bowl weekend. The question posed to the audience was “what would Sherman do, play or be present for the birth?”.
Many people texted and tweeted in that she should get to decide if he plays or comes to the birth. Okay, fine. If she wants him there, if he wants to prioritize the birth over the game that is their decision to make. I’m sure he will be chastised by folks left and right (probably people that bet money on the hawks) if he were to miss the game. But people, get over yourselves; this is his life, not yours. He’s a part of a team yes, but being a father and supportive boyfriend, well that’s very much a team sport too.
On the flip side, this is his profession, so quite honestly I don’t know that it’s the end of the world if he misses the birth because he’s playing in the Super Bowl. There are a lot of fathers that miss the birth of their children for bigger reasons like being away at war, and for much smaller reasons like being suck in rush hour traffic.
Either way, I honestly don’t care what he does. Even if it were my team playing in the Super Bowl (I’m a Bills fans, so that’s quite a ways down the hypothetical road), I believe that the team earns the win and they can do it without one guy.
What got me all fired up were all of the callers (which were male) that had the great suggestions of “she needs a cesarean” or “get her on that pitocin now”. These men will never know what it’s like to grow a baby in their bodies, or what it takes to get one out. These men made these suggestions because this is what their wives did, and this is what is normal now.
Cesareans used to be performed in emergency situations only. Their purpose was to save lives that otherwise would be lost. Today, cesareans are discussed and practiced as though its like getting a tooth pulled; but they aren’t like getting a tooth pulled. Cesareans involve many levels of invasive cuts through a woman’s body. They are painful to recover from and result in numbness, scars and internal adhesions to organs. When being performed outside of an emergency scenario they are putting the lives of mother and baby at unnecessary risk, and setting the mother up for future cesareans which carry additional risk every time she has one. Instead of viewing the c-section as the serious surgery it is, doctors are encouraging it and friends are promoting it as ways to dodge an inconvenient spontaneous labor, and to avoid those pesky labor pains.
Like I said before, I don’t care what he does, or what she decides. There are pros and cons to every situation, and if she decided that the risks associated with a c-section are worth definitely having him there, okay. What I hope is that she and all the other woman that are preparing to give birth have factual information to help them make educated decisions, and not think they’re just going in to get a tooth pulled.