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I'm Totally Faking It

~ Pretending to be a functioning wife, mother, friend and adult.

I'm Totally Faking It

Category Archives: Food

WTF Wednesday: How Do You Get Goldfish out of a Nose?

18 Wednesday Mar 2015

Posted by ericakatherine in Food, Parenting, WTF Wednesday

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

Addiction, Goldfish Crackers, Nose, toddlers

I have a toddler. I have a toddler that likes to eat grapes, goldfish, nuts and pretzels. I have a toddler that also likes to stick his fingers up his nose. Recently, the toddler has decided to join his two favorite activities into one, and is sticking his food up his nose.

The hubby and I have managed to catch him in the process, before anything has gotten good and up there, but it got me wondering what would I do if he got a Goldfish cracker lodged in his nose? Continue reading →

WTF Wednesday: My Latest Pinterest Fail

08 Thursday Jan 2015

Posted by ericakatherine in Food

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

dinner, Pinterest Fail, steak

I love Pinterest. It gives me lots of fantastic ideas for party favors, holiday decor and lots of random motivational quotes. All of which I do not use. I would say the only thing that I really use Pinterest for is recipes. It’s great to see a random recipe I want to try, Pin it and come back to it when I’m ready to give it a whirl.

Today the menu called for stuffed flank steak. Sounds good, right? Looks good in the picture on the recipe page. The directions seemed easy enough… but I am queen of not following screwing up directions. Continue reading →

The Conflict, Loving My Body and Wanting to Lose Weight

30 Tuesday Dec 2014

Posted by ericakatherine in Food, Health, Me

≈ 7 Comments

Tags

body hate, Body love, Dove, food, food issues, New Years Resolutions, Real Beauty Campaign, self acceptance, Special K, weight loss, weight watchers

As we approach the New Year everyone is talking resolutions. The one that tops the list for most is to lose weight. I’d love to lose 25lbs (or even 5).  What won’t be new to the year is the inner battle I have with this desire to lose weight and mission to love myself and my body for what it is. But this year, my resolution is to not join Weight Watchers (for the umpteenth time).

I’ve struggled with my weight my entire adolescence and adult life. Just this year I’ve lost and gained the same 10lbs TWICE. Seriously, I lost 10lbs, gained it back, lost it again and gained it back again. I’m right back where I was this time last year, possibly a couple pounds heavier.  I can’t seem to stay committed to the changes it takes to lose weight and maintain it.

I would love to be in a place where I didn’t hate my body… you know, where I can look in the mirror and not cringe at the overfull, yet smushy area that is my stomach. Body acceptance and self love is all the rage. Companies like Dove and Kellog’s Special K are all over telling me that I’m okay just they way I am.

Except I’m not. Being overweight isn’t good for me and I know it…and so do my knees and ankles when I run. The thing is, the only way I know how to start the process of losing weight isn’t by saying “you look great just the way you are”, it’s by saying “you’re fat and gross, stop eating so much”.

To me, loving myself they way I am and losing weight to be healthier are in direct conflict with each other.  I don’t say “no” to french fries because my body is better off without the starch and fried fat. I say “no” because I’m too fat to allow myself to eat them. It’s a punishment, not a job well done. It’s no wonder my weight yo-yo’s. I berate myself into losing weight, only to applaud my efforts with that basket of fries I’ve been denying myself for weeks (or months).

Maybe instead of dropping my money into the pockets of weight loss companies, I’ll spend it on a behavioral nutritionist that will help me work out my food issues. Overall, this new year needs to be about changing my brain instead of changing my body. Finding a way to make healthy food choices because it makes me feel good, instead of withholding junk food as some sort of penance for previous discretions.  I’ll be sure to keep you updated… but don’t worry, I’ll refrain from telling you every item of food I’m eating every day…unless it’s reeeeeaaaally good.

Why Did We Think We Could Go To A Restaurant For Dinner?

23 Sunday Nov 2014

Posted by ericakatherine in Food, Parenting

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Tags

2 year old, booster seat, eating out, guacamole, ketchup, margaritas, mexican, restaurant, tazmanian devil, toddler

Friday night the husband made the suggestion of going out for dinner… he even let me pick the spot.  I’m a sucker for some guacamole and tacos, so off we went with toddler in tow to my favorite mexican restaurant.

To start the evening off it was a 15 minute wait for a table. Our first instinct is to head over to the bar to get a couple of margaritas while we wait. Well there is a reason all the people with kids wait for tables huddled at the opposite wall from the bar. Continue reading →

WTF Wednesday: Vagina Cookies

24 Wednesday Sep 2014

Posted by ericakatherine in Food, WTF Wednesday

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

cookies, cupcakes, vagina

Vagina cookies and vagina cupcakes, they are a thing.  This was brought to my attention after reading this post about a mom that brought vagina cookies in for her kids 2nd grade class and the teacher had to tell her they couldn’t serve them to the kids. Mom got irate and angry texts ensued. Continue reading →

Shhhh, Don’t Tell Anyone

15 Monday Sep 2014

Posted by ericakatherine in Food, Nothing

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

cheese, domestic, food, homemade, pretzels

Shhhh, Don’t tell anyone, but I think I might be DOMESTIC! Look what I made; homemade pretzels and cheese dip.

Homemade Pretzels

Homemade Pretzels and Cheese

And I’m not talking what I used to consider homemade, which would be opening a box and microwaving. I actually made the dough, rolled it out, boiled and baked the pretzels.  Seriously, who am I?

UPDATE: Here are the recipe links in case you were wondering where this deliciousness came from.

Pretzels: The Food Network

Cheese dip: Luci’s Morsels Blog

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